Week #19 - 05/26/2015

New Companion, New Work

Sorry I didn't write yesterday. The library was closed. I am still staying in Hampton, but I got a new companion! His name is Elder Jackson. He is from Idaho, and has been on his mission for 7 months. We both know about the same amount of Spanish (His old area didn't have much Spanish), so no more relying on Elder Marte to understand everything! Pray for us, we need it! I had to translate Sunday because some American members decided to drop by for sacrament, and it was utterly awful. I did a decent job with my companion's introduction testimony, but when the president got up, I could barley make up a sentence. Understanding and even speaking a language is a whole other thing than having to talk and think in two different ones at the same time.  Luckily a member came to my aide at the last minute and took over. 

It is awesome being with my new companion. He is very dedicated and is teaching me a lot. He is the youngest of 6 kids, and is a really funny guy. It was weird, at first, getting used to someone who can understand me in English. I cracked a joke out loud to myself, and he actually laughed. I forgot what it was like for someone to understand my "American" humor! It is good getting to know him, like coming off an island after 3 months into civilization, haha.  Or like getting a new companion after being with a companion who couldn't speak much English in a Spanish only church!

My favorite part is that he likes to work as much as I do, and we have been finding people like crazy. He used to play soccer in high school, so we have a great icebreaker for any Mexican we find, haha.   It has been a blast. This ward is going to grow, I just know it. And I am still finding the Book of Mormon more amazing every day. You can find an answer to one of your questions on any page, even the war chapters. And the revelation I receive every day from it's pages for not only myself but others is unreal, and so powerful. Every night I set my plan for what I am going to study the following morning to help my investigators, but the spirit just shows me the next morning where all the things are I need to share. I am constantly amazed at how the spirit works, if you only ask for and depend on it's guidance. 

And I am constantly amazed at how lucky we are to have a prophet that receives far greater revelation than I do, who has the authority to guide our entire world. And the Book of Mormon is a testament of that truth of a living prophet. It is funny, all we have to know is that the Book of Mormon is true, then everything else falls into place. That Joseph Smith was a prophet of God that translated it with the direction from God, that through Joeseph Smith, Christ's restored his true church, and that the living prophet holds those same keys.

 The leaders of the Church are not just interpreters of the scriptures or good men doing their best, they actually receive revelation from God, Some people have their trial in life be to be burdened down with despairing challenges. God's purpose is "to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man", and gives every one of us trials specific to what he knows will help us, if we can only trust in him and overcome them. The prophets themselves have stated that the Lord will never let us be tempted more than we can bare, but we must pray for strength, and not give in. And if we withstand boldly, with continued trust in him, he will reward us for our trials more than we could ever have dreamed, and we will become better and more Christlike people because of it. What man knows why the Lord placed certain trials upon us? The Lord knows, and has promised that it is all for his best, if we keep trying. Because God loves us. 

We can be a gift, show we can overcome even the hardest of things of self, our nature - the natural man, by continuing to trust in the Lord, imagine how much help we would be to other's who are going through the same thing.  This world is so hard, we have no choice but to rely on God if we want to make it through. Being comfortable does not allow for growth. Our Heavenly Father sent his firstborn, and most perfect son, down to suffer more than we can imagine. His own son asked if it was possible that the cup should pass from him, but Heavenly father let him bear the full, complete and infinite weight and pressure of all the pains, sicknesses, sins, and Temptations of the world, so that Christ might have a more perfect understanding and love for us. And Christ's joy became full. Every single thing the Father does for us is to prepare us to meet him, meekly, and humbly before him, so that he might glorify and exalt us. Taking a break from church is the worst thing someone can do when they are searching for answers. Has God not proved them in the past? If they have doubts, they need to keep reading the scriptures, going to church, and praying, and not cease. God has promised to resolve their doubts, as long as they give him the chance. I had no idea how important the sacrament was and how important the church is for personal revelation. And I wish I could just quote scripture off the top of my head, but I am still learning. I love you all.

Week #18 - 05/18/2015

                    Conqistar o Morrir

This has been a long week but at the same time a good one. We had quite a few set backs with a number of investigators, but Satan better work harder because it only motivates me more. There is a scripture I love in Alma chapter 56, verse 16 and 17. 

"... for they had fought valiantly by day and toiled by night to maintain their cities; and thus they had suffered afflictions of every kind. 17) And now they were determined to conquer in this place or die."

That has basically been my motto, through migraines and sleepless nights, where even in my dreams I am planning lessons for my investigators. From relapse to rejection and days when you are so sick you can hardly think, if I can still walk, or even crawl, I will keep going. I will conquer in Hampton or die, and every day I love it more and more. Who else can say they did all this for the most amazing purpose God can grant us? I can feel his help in everything, and that is why I can actually stand up. 

a conqistar o morir. 

It is amazing how much we can see God helping us if we just take the time to think about it and write it down. And we will never have enough time to actually write it all down, but you can start to see miracles every day as you try. I wish I did more. My old journal was full of nothing but my own stupid opinions and stupid things me and my friends did, or things I thought I knew about life. I saw a talk from Henry B. Eyrying where he told about how he kept a journal for years for his children, where nomatter how tired he was or little time he had, at the end of the day he would always right down a few things the Lord did for him. Man, I need to do that more. I feel I have lost or forgotten so many spiritual experiences that shaped my life, and even the ones I haven't forgot I don't remember completely. But I do have one experience I want to share with you guys. 

Every since we began my mission, I have been telling people that if they read the Book of Mormon with real intent to know if it is the word of God and act on that answer, with a sincere heart and faith in Jesus Christ that they will get an answer, that they will. And I had yet to do that myself. Don't get me wrong, I knew with my whole heart that it was true already. As I have prayed to understand and  have read the scriptures, I have felt the spirit, I have seen it's words shape and change lives, and have often received great personal revelation from it after a prayer. But I had never prayed specifically if it was true, I had never needed to.

When I was 12 and laying in my bed one night, I had prayed to God and asked him if he was real, and if he loved me. And I received a feeling up such peace and love that I can't describe. And I wish I wrote it down, because I forgot so much of what exactly that felt like. But a couple weeks ago I decided to put into action exactly what I have been preaching, and I got on my knees, and prayed to know if the Book of Mormon was the exact word of God. And I waited for a good 5 minutes, and felt the same. I still felt fine, felt good, but not any different than when I started the prayer. I was a little annoyed and impatient I didn't recieve a grand spiritual witness right then and there to confirm what I already knew, but I remember what I had seen and felt before, and just figured they Lord knew I could go a bit without a great spiritual manifestation. And I stuck too it, and the days went on. It had been a particularly difficult two weeks, with a lot of angry people and backlash for bearing a testimony, and I hate to admit it, thoughts started coming into my head as the advisary continueally reminded me of my lack of receiving a spiritual whitness. And while I still continued forward, remembering what I felt before, or at least trying to, some of those doubts dwelt in my heart longer than I would like to admit, and only seemed to increase. I prayed to God more than a few times a little impatiently for that witness I had been waiting on, and while I still felt his guiding hand in all my work, felt the spirit while I taught, and saw strait miracles, I was still impatient for that answer. 

Last Thursday night after planning for the next day, I was about to crash into bed, but suddenly felt the impulse to look up a scripture for one of our struggling investigators. I casually flipped open the book of Mormon and looked up Alma 34, thinking it might help him understand the atonement and purpose of this life a bit better. I tiredly said a quick 2 sentence prayer and started reading. And about at verse 6 I just felt this feeling I could never exactly explain, nor have felt before in my life. I can't explain it much better than "my mind began to be enlightened". I felt like my mind was suddenly clear, absolutely clean, and I felt this peace, this uplifting peace so strongly. It wasn't like this warm feeling that makes you all comfortable and sleepy, it made me feel lifted, more alert than ever, with a single, overwhelming feeling that what I held in my hands was the exact word of God. In short, it was awesome, and as I read, I read the book of Mormon like I never have before, and the next short few verses, I understood more than what I thought possible. I then spent the next 30 minutes trying to describe in my journal what it felt like. 

God will always answers our prayers, as long as we continue on. Sometimes he tests us a bit. After all, "there is no miracle untill after the trial of your faith." I love you guys, see you all next week. And even with that, I still know the book of mormon is true just from what I learn from it every day. 

Week #17 - 05/11/2015

           Cleaning & Change:

So this week has been pretty cool. We (I mean I) have been cleaning the apartment top to bottom, bit by bit during our lunch our. I am going to get a new companion in a week and a half, and I want everything clean so he knows what to expect, haha. Little nervous about getting a new companion. I love my companion now like a brother, and over the past 3 months, I have gotten over all of the little things that bugged me or drove me insane, and we are a darn good team, now. I don't really want to have to go through all that again, but hey, aint' any other way to grow except by change. 

We had a pretty cool experience this week. We were just walking behind these houses in a dirt alleyway, and we saw this man doing some yard work with a shovel. I didn't really want to talk to him (middle aged white guys doing their yard don't have a good track record with us) but my companion was already walking up to him. (He has no fear, he doesn't have to talk to the guy. No one but me can understand his English.) 

He was super grumpy when we started talking to him, and said something along the lines of "Don't worry about me, I ain't interested. I know God, and I pray to him, even if it aint always the right way." I was just going to hand him a card and leave without wasting any more time, but the spirit just made me talk, and I just asked him a question. Forgot the question exactly, but it was something like "Why do you say it isn't always the right way?" Not the question most grumpy guys would want to hear, but it was amazing, he just opened up. He started telling us about his whole relation ship with God, about how he felt the Spirit the first time he held his daughter, about how the first time he prayed to God with real intent was to take away his mother's pain due to an illness, and when she died two weeks later, he heard a voice and felt a feeling of peace and comfort say "I took away her pain, she is safe with me." All we had to do was ask an occasional specific question, relying on the spirit, and he told us his fears about the world and where it is going, his doubts and wanting direction. Then I just asked him what he would ask a prophet, like Moses, a real guy who received revelation directly from God. He said he never exactly thought about it like that, and when I explained we have a living prophet today who received direct guidance from God for the world, it blew his mind a bit. He had a million questions about how this prophet is chosen, how do we know it's a prophet, and a lot more, but I just asked if it would be alright if we could come back and teach his family. 

It was the funniest thing, he stopped, took like 30 seconds to respond, and said "You know, I don't think I have ever talked to someone about my life like that, I'm a pretty closed man, and I honestly have no idea why I did. But yea, you guys can come back."

The spirit is so tangible, so amazing, and I love every day getting the chance to see the Lord's Hand working. We don't do anything, we don't open them up, the Spirit does, and works through us. And the whole experience just reaffirmed in my mind how important having a prophet is, to guide us when everyone else in this world is in such confusion. When we came back a few days later, he told us he didn't have time for our whole "spiel", he just wanted to know about the prophet thing. Funny he asked that, we answered his question by teaching the entire restoration lesson. He was skeptical at first, thinking the next prophet is voted in or something, but when we explained it, and how no one in the church is paid, and how every member has the right to sustain the prophet and ask God if he is actually his servant, it was like a door opened for this guy. We told him he could know the truth by that same feeling of peace and love he felt before, and it was awesome! When we asked him, right there in the first lesson, "If you receive a confirmation through The Holy Ghost that Thomas S. Monson is a prophet of God and that this is the Lord's only true church, will you be baptized?' He responded ,"Who in their right mind wouldn't, if they received an actual response from God?!" 

It's moments like that that make the mission, and only grow my testimony. We are so blessed that God has given us a guide, his voice of direction, council, and comfort in these days. Because God loves us. And what is so amazing is that if we have doubts, and we ask God in honest, sincere prayer, and search the scriptures for an answer and remain firm in our covenants, even members since birth are entitled to that same spirit to testify of the unyielding truth that this is the Church of Jesus Christ, and the only one that deserves to hold his sacred name. And God has promised that if you continue on in faith, that answer will come. And I can say that with certainty and unapologetically, because I have felt that same Spirit of God testify to me of it's truth. And he continues to do it every single day. 

Love you guys, see you next week.

Week #16 - 05/04/2015

"Drugs, Food, Fights, and Miracles"

So this week has been hard, but good. I don't know exactly how, but I am forced to grow up pretty fast here. We are trying to help 2 drug addicts quit for the 4th time, along with other alcoholics and smokers. Talk about learning on the job. I've had to study the entire addiction recovery program. I am a 19 year old kid trying to teach these people how to repair their utterly broken lives and rely on Christ, making them give me their drugs or pipes so I can throw them away. It is really humbling, but it is incredible to know God is behind me in this, because I couldn't do anything without him. And he is giving me wisdom I don't have, and words I have never heard. It is amazing to see the change the Atonemtent of Jesus Christ makes in their lives. I am learning to love these people so much, but I will tell you one thing, it hurts to see them fall again. I can just see a bit of what they can become, what God knows they can be, how 1 month, 1 year, 10 years down the line they can look back and know they are a different person. I just wish they could see it a bit more. But as they learn day by day to rely on the savior more, and know of his and Our Father's love, they can start to see it for themselves. 

On a different note, The fight last Saturday was the talk of this entire town. All the Mexicans got their biggest tvs out and set them in their garage or packed their living room full of chairs and invited everyone they knew. We were going around that night checking up on investigators and knocking on doors, and every one, even random Mexicans, invited us in, shoved a drink and food in our hand, and invited us to sit down and join them. It was so hard to tell them no, and we were fasting to add on to things, so we couldn't even eat their food. You can't tell a Mexican no if he offers you food (just try it) so we just put it in our truck and had all this delicious food tempting us the whole night as we drove around with it next to us in the truck. But we withstood it and it payed off big time. We have invited two of our investigators (a young couple) to church every Sunday for weeks, but something always hinders them (mostly being hung over or drugged out from the night before). 

They told us before that they knew they needed to go, so that this time they would leave the door unlocked and we could come wake them up. I was really hesitant to do it, didn't really want to bust in and see something I didn't want to, and I didn't want to deal with 2 tired, hungover people on a Sunday morning, but I agreed. We showed up, and the door was locked, but the keys were still in it. I figured it was just a weird way leave the door "unlocked", so I turned the key and went in. Far from the weirdest thing I have seen on my mission, haha. So we practically kicked down the door to their bedroom knocking to wake them up (we weren't gonna open it), and they were surprised but really happy that we were there. They told us they had completely forgotten about it, and had no idea how the keys got there. The Lord works in mysterious ways, but he works. They came to church, and said all they felt was complete happiness in that building, and with the people. We had testimony meeting, and it was one of the best in my life (as far as I can tell. Some people talk reeeaaaly fast in Spanish.) The woman investigator had to leave the bathroom because she was crying so much. It was amazing. The Lord is behind us in this work all the way, and as I see his hand in this work every week, I am constantly amazed how much he does and how little we actually do for these people, and change their hearts. We get a front row seat to miracles. I love you guys, I love this so much.